On the surface a lot of guys can come across as “ballers,” but its up to you to be alert and pay attention to the waving red flags that make it clear this stud is really being a bum with his money.  Before dating becomes “I do,” look for these warning signs and clues.  If you find them, run OR go through some serious counseling before walking down the aisle! Remember, most marriages end over financial disagreements, but be clear that people who enter marriage with bad money habits don’t magically begin them because they’re married.  They were showing signs all along!

Red Flag #1: He drives a big flashy car and lives in a fly apartment – the one he calls a “condo” – in the ritzy part of town, but his furniture consists of a futon and one flat screen television.  Okay, if he moved in last Saturday, then we can give him a pass, but if he’s a grown man and he’s been there longer than 30 days with no real furniture, chances are he’s not the baller you thought he was.  The only thing worse would be him living in a fully furnished home. . . with his mama!

Red Flag #2: When you met him, he was buying out the bar at the club. But, everytime you come to that empty apartment/”condo,” his refrigerator is just as bare with the exception of the Arm & Hammer Baking Soda he uses to keep the ice fresh. Be leery of anyone who is so concerned about impressing complete strangers on Saturday night, he’ll starve for the rest of the week.

Red Flag #3: Have you ever seen him get his mail out of the mailbox? If you answered “No,” be concerned. He can’t be in control of his finances if he’s ignoring his mail. Someone who has their finances together won’t want to run the risk of missing something important. On the flip side, if he does get the mail, but the contents are always pastel colored envelopes that read “URGENT” or “PAST DUE” across the front, you should still be concerned. That is a pretty standard clue that someone is having trouble paying their bills on time.

Red Flag #4:  He never answers his phone when you’re around.  Of course initially you assume its another woman, but once you catch a glimpse of the phone flashing once or twice, you realize he’s ignoring 800 numbers, or worse: those phone numbers that have ‘0’ all across the screen – we all know that’s the universal sign of a creditor that means business!  More than likely he owes some big money. Utilities under collection don’t get you those type of “special” calls!

Red Flag #5:  He doesn’t have a bank account. You thought him buying everything in cash was just the baller in him.  Now you realize he has no checking account, ATM card or debit card. If you ask him why and he says anything remotely close to, “Check cashing places are cheaper,” politely excuse yourself and run for cover!  With that type of thinking, he’ll be putting his debt in your name in no time! -SWFW