Been hesitating on adding some spice to your marriage or you just don’t understand the purpose of date night? Your spouse may have decided to search for what’s missing elsewhere. Keep reading for a few tell-tale signs that will clue you in on whether your spouse may be cheating:

No longer needy

Formally clingy and needy, a husband who displays sudden independence might have had his needs for attention satisfied elsewhere. Remember how his lack of responsibility used to wear you out. Then, consider how he now takes long motorcycle rides with ‘the boys’ on beautiful weekends when he used to relish following you to the laundry, grocery store, outlet mall. It might be worth taking a look at who is in this bike, car or sports club.

No more anger

Did your wife used to get angry when you couldn’t meet her for lunch or commit your Saturday for you both to take the dog to the vet? But, now a no-go gets a polite kiss on the cheek with a sly, “No problem, dear. Maybe next time.” Maybe you just gave her an excuse for a few lost hours with her new lover.

New unidentifiable friends

New book club, new prayer group, new movie club? Do they meet all over town, never at the same location? If asked where this prayer group meets the reply is “Oh, ummm, Church of the…mumble, mumble, mumble.” Well, who do I know who’s in it? “Well, you know … what’s her name and … Wow! Look at the time — I better get going!” Sound familiar? You’ve got problems.

Shower? Really? Really.

The cell gets more protection than your children or retirement assets. If you even look at the phone, your husband deftly removes it from view and places it in his pocket, desk drawer, or locks it in the console of his car. Or, discovering that odd ringing sound is a poorly hidden extra cell phone you didn’t know she had. Don’t recognize the number? You aren’t supposed to.

Way Too Much Attention

Attention is great for lots of reasons. But, if it borders on over-kill, your spouse might be feeling guilty about something. Perhaps they haven’t crossed that line, but they could be giving it serious consideration. You’ll know when they cross the line: the attention will likely turn into fault-finding or criticism aimed at you because they will have another warm, intimate body to compare you to.

Stepping Up the A-Game

Trips to the salon used to be an unjustifiable expense except at Easter. But, now she has a weekly standing appointment with Mr. Dwight. And, you don’t remember her wearing panties so sexy on your honeymoon and now she and her ‘butt-wisps’ float out the door every morning. It’s time for some serious analysis about what has occurred in the relationship. By the same measure, if you remember chuckling when your husband wore pajama bottoms to pick up a gallon of milk and a jar of mayo from the supermarket, but that’s no longer the case, think about where this wardrobe paradigm shifted. Suddenly, he’s Mr. Ralph Lauren Purple Label walking in the door with bag after bag of new rags. There’s a woman somewhere advising him on how the $200 turtleneck sets his eyes off beautifully.