Since her days as the flighty, fashion-forward Dionne in 1995’s Clueless, Stacey Dash has held the attention of every male eye looking her way. Now at a gorgeously resilient 44, the MILF of two is still a rapper’s dream-girl, having recently wrapped up videos for both Rick Ross (“Super High”) and Game (“Shake”). But on a darker note, Stacey was also in the news this month for pressing charges against her physically abusive third husband. VIBE caught up with the chestnut beauty to talk intellectual rappers and leaving bad boys behind.
So how did you end up on a motorcyle with Rick Ross?
Stacey Dash: F. Gary Gray called me and he’s a director that I wanted to work with for a very long time. He’s like ‘Look I’m doing this music video, it’s based around Harley Davidson and it’s going to be amazing, will you do it with me?’ I said, ‘Of course! You’re F. Gary Gray! I love your vision, yes!
Nice, when did you guys film?
We shot it Sunday and Monday at Palm Desert—both 18-hour workdays.
What’s your role in the video?
I play the video vixen. I’m in a Lamborghini and he pulls up on me. I’m not having a good time with my man and he’s like ‘Come with me.’ There’s about 20 guys in Harley bikes surrounding me. I’m like ‘Heck yeah, I’m getting on the bike!’
Are you hesitant about being in rappers’ music videos?
Not at all. Work is work. And if it’s something that you like and are getting paid, I wouldn’t be hesitant to do it all. If it was something where I didn’t like the concept and it was just some Mickey Mouse director, that’s different.
How familiar were you with Ross’ work?
I wasn’t very familiar. Kinda. I heard a couple songs that I liked and then I asked around some people I know [laughs] and listened to “Super High” and liked it a lot.
What were you asking people?
I was asking people in [the] business what they thought of him. They said ‘Oh he’s a good rapper, he’s solid.’
Would you hang out with him outside of work?
Oh, absolutely. He’s so nice. I can see that. I like him. And he’s smart.
Is he a serious kind of guy?
He’s quiet and I’m quiet so it’s really good. When words are spoken, they mean something.
What about Game, how’d that video happen?
We did a movie together [a year ago]—that I’m pretty sure is not coming out—and became friends. So you know, he called me and said ‘Please’ and I said ‘Okay.’
What movie was this?
I don’t even want to talk about, if it comes out great, if it doesn’t fine. Unfortunately, they didn’t have enough money to make a movie and they tried. We did finish I think. It was not a very…I don’t know if it’s coming out.
Game’s video looks a bit more typical of a hip-hop video then Ross’. What was his pitch to you?
His pitch was ‘I’m doing a video, I need you to come at 4 o’clock in the morning to be the girl that I wake up to. I’m like ‘Ugh, really? He’s like ‘Please.’ I said ‘Ugh, really.’ He says ‘Please.’ I couldn’t say no. [Laughs]
Yeah, those naked girls on the couch caught me off guard.
He knew I would have no part in that. I’m [said] ‘Once that sun rises, I’m out.’ And that was it. I got there, I shot it and I left.
Is Game smart like Ross too?
Game is highly intelligent. He’s even educated.
What are your conversations with him like?
We have all kinds, from politics, to finances, to life, to religion. He’s an intelligent man. That’s what I hope gets exposed about him. Which is why I did my part in his video. I want him to expose that side of himself.
What’s stopping him?
He says everything is about timing. He’s just such an intelligent man and no one knows. He’s articulate as well.
So you guys kind of made a deal?
Yeah, he promises that eventually it’s going to happen. I’m holding him to it. And I think he has a great voice for rap. I think his voice is amazing, so I would love to hear him rap some… stuff. [Laughs]
I was surprised to hear that your most recent husband, Emmanuel Xuereb, was physically abusive towards you. TMZ put up the legal paper, but did you ever want the public to know?
I didn’t necessarily want it to get out, but it got out. Unfortunately, it’s not the first time for me and that’s something I was going to get into [publicly.] I was in a [bad] relationship for five years when I was a young girl with my son’s father. It’s a sickness. And it’s also… it’s about being a woman and being strong enough to leave. And sometimes you’re not. It’s very sad and women need to be helped, not condemned. It’s not like you want to be there getting your ass beat.
Was it hard leaving your son’s father when you were younger?
I left finally, after my son was born. My son saved my life because had I not had him, I would probably be dead. I got the courage from my son to leave and do what I had to do.
Did you feel like you were in a life-threatening situation with Emmanuel?
No. ‘Scuse me, I’ve got two fucking kids. There’s no fucking way, man. Once he got physical, that was it. ‘Oh yeah? You’re going to put your hands on me?’ I don’t think so, you’re going to jail. You only get to do that once, that’s it.
Exactly. Did your children know what was going on?
No. My son didn’t really know and my daughter has no idea. She’s oblivious. She’s just a happy little girl that goes to school.
Is that a talk you want to save for later?
For Lola, she doesn’t need to know. It’s not her father. All she needs to know is that we’re not together anymore and we wish him well. My son, he knows what the deal was. My son knows everything. We grew up together. I’m completely honest with him. And he’s a grown man.
He’s super protective over his mother?
For sure.
Has your ex-husband tried to get in contact with you at all?
No. The restraining order worked. And that’s the other thing I want women to know: If you do the steps, they work. They try and tell you, ‘You can’t get away from me.’ But go to the law, it works.
With having experienced two abusive relationships, how do you deal with the aftermath? Are you seeing a therapist?
Yeah, I have a therapist and I pray a lot. I’m staying very close to God right now. I keep saying God is my man because I’m not used to being without [one]. It’s not easy, it’s very difficult for me. And I just… I get on my knees a lot.
Do you think there’s a pattern with the guys you choose? The bad boy?
Oh no. My daughter’s father is an upper class twit, an Englishmen. He’s a really good man, we just didn’t work out. And my first husband would never hurt me in a million years. So I don’t know what happened with this last guy.
Were your other ex-husbands like ‘Yo Stace, we will kill that man if you want us’?
Yes, of course. That was already a given. They wanted me out of the situation, so yeah.
Do you have any more court dates left?
Oh, no. That’s done. We’re done.
Divorce finalized?
Yep. Life is moving on.